Reader, Dump Him

Something tells me that David Duchovny has been caught with his pants down by Tea Leoni. But it's okay, it's not cheating, it's sex addiction.

What the fuck ever. Most men married to the almost impossibly wholesome and beautiful Tea Leoni wouldn't look upon this as a great problem. And most men with a modicum of maturity wouldn't put his wife and his children (one of whom is 9, for God's sake, more than old enough to understand what's going on and be bullied in the playground about it) through this ridiculous charade. Say sorry and if she forgives you, she forgives you; and if she doesn't then she'll kick you to the curb which you more than deserve.

Sex addiction doesn't exist. As someone who has lived with a drug addict, I somehow do not think while Mr Duchovny is boning some nubile young blonde he is hysterical and sick, filled with the deepest, violent and most horrific self-hate and loathing, begging every deity to relieve him of this terrible burden of sex addiction combined with good looks and money. If anyone has a destructive addiction, I'd say it's Tea Leoni jonesing for her husband. Sweetie, you can do so much better. I realise it isn't actually any of my business, but this drives me crazy. It's insulting to real addicts. How can real addiction be recognised as a dreadful disease, when you have wankers like him using the name in vain?

There are ladies' men - Hugh Grant - and the women who stay with them know it and stay anyway. Hugh Grant is too rational to say he has sex addiction when actually he just wants a lay. Then you have the ones that make a mistake - Matthew Broderick - it remains to be seen if Sarah Jessica Parker stays with him, but at least they're handling it in as dignified a way as you can after the fact your husband has screwed a 20-something for months has hit international headlines.

Monkey has just suggested that perhaps she's making him go to rehab because it's in the pre-nup that she doesn't get as much money if she doesn't support him through that first and then dump him. That's actually a possibility. How Hollywood.