The Joy of Texas

Mostly, the culture clash between Monkey and I is not too intense. We take the piss out of each other's accents fairly constantly- although he can do my norf Lundun easier than I can do is Richardson, Texas drawl, mostly because since he moved here when he was 16, his Texan accent has evened out.


But you can't take Texas out of the man. Years into living with him and knowing him better than I know anyone outside my immediate family, it still makes me smile when he calls people (including his mum and dad) 'ma'am' and 'sir'.

Texans - and he is Texan, not American - Texans are different. When he visited me in Los Angeles, he was visibly out of tune with your average Californian. I knew way more about Texan culture than my LA flatmate did, by which I mean I listen to country music without falling off the chair laughing.

So Monkey has loped off back to Richardson for a while. I turned down the chance to join him, partly because of my dire financial situation, partly because for all that I love Richardson and Dallas, once you have been once, there really has to be a good reason to go back (harsh, but a better one than Monkey's really lovely family and friends), and I've been many times.

However I admit now he is gone I am all misty-eyed for Texas.

Reasons to Love Texas

1. The Roads
Bigger roads than you knew possible. Huge. Massive. You have to take a picnic with you when you cross them.

2. The Trucks
Sure, there are pick-up trucks everywhere in America, especially in California. But something about sitting outside a roadside bar in the parking lot in a truck, drinking beer under the Texan stars (see below) puts me in my happy place.

3. The Music
I love country music. And the Lone Star State has some cracking stuff, blaring out all over the place. Sing it!

4. The Sky
I know Montana is known as the Big Sky, but as far as I'm concerned Texas has more sky than I knew existed. Sky is everywhere! EVERYWHERE!

5. Friday Night Lights

"IT'S ONLY FOOTBALL!"

(..But they like it. A lot. An awful lot.)

Once you scream this at the screen and get it off your chest, Friday Night Lights is actually not the monumental chore that, to be honest, I had it pegged as. I don't know the first thing about American football, and I don't have the smallest desire to do so. But if anyone out there wants a picture of Texas, look no further. Richardson is by no means smalltown Texas, but I think I understood Monkey's childhood more after watching it. Not least why we must have Dallas Cowboys shit everywhere. It is, and I do not say this lightly, probably the most literate, intelligent, well shot and written drama on US TV right now.

It's not only football. It's a way of life. (And also, it's not football at all because it's American football. But I'll keep that to myself.)